1.140 – All The Things You Said

Someone’s playing the piano somewhere but I can’t hear the beauty of the art because you’re screaming again.

I disown you. You aren’t mine anymore.

Someone’s painting a masterpiece somewhere but I can’t see the smooth strokes of possibility because you’re screaming again.

No one will ever love you. No one wants you. You’re going to be alone. 

Someone’s singing a melody of hope wrapped in vines of tranquility and I can’t quite understand the words because you’re screaming again.

Why don’t you just kill yourself already.

Someone’s knocking at the door…convinced they can save me but I won’t open it because you’re screaming again.

All I can feel are the daggers of 10,268 days, 246,408 hours, 887,068,800 seconds. Of every living, breathing moment I didn’t choose to have…and yet, I’m still here…despite your screaming.

I wish you were never born. 

Some days, I feel the same way. I’d put on the headphones to stifle the sound, the gut-wrenching echoes of your vocal attacks but such things cannot kill the scars that fester in my mind.

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